Janji atao Bukan Janji??? Datang atau Gag Datang???

Guys....sering gag sih ngalamin yg namanya muales luar biasa buat menepati suatu 'janji' sama temen2 loe?....Maksud gw, awalnya loe semangat juga ngebayangin bakal ketemu temen2 deket loe...tp beranjak sore loe ngerasa semakin males juga...cos beban kerja loe seharian ini berasa bikin badan loe capek bgt....jd, instead of ngebayangin hanging out with close friends with cup of hot coffee...yg terbayang didepan mata loe adl pulang cepet, mandi air hangat...sama tempat tidur loe yang nyaman....Kalo lg dalam situasi kayak gitu....what would you do??

Sekarang, in this very moment, gw ngantuk bgt, pengen bgt pulang cepet udh terbayang dimata gw hal2 yg gw ceritain diatas...plus bonus ponakan gw yg lucu buat obat capek gue....disisi yang laen...temen2 deket gw dr jaman kuliah dr td pagi udh kasih tau kl sore ini kita2 bakal ketemuan...and i did say yes....but i didn't promise them...gw cuma bilang Insyaallah...gw bakal datang....cuman, salah satu temen gw kayaknya udh ada feeling2 kl gw bakalan gag nongol...jd dr tadi dia udh 'ngancem' kl gw sampe gag datang....hehehehheeh....

Asli...gw pengen bgt datang....tp, keinginan itu is not as big as my intention to go home as fast as i could...gw ngebayangin kl gw balik sendiri ntar malem..gag ada tebengan, gag ada yg jemput...duhh...gw musti naik mikrolet kl gw pengen irit...cause lately, i've become Ms. TMP* myself....i wouldn't indulge myself for a taxi unless at specific conditions, such as : raining, late at night, totally tired and sleepy. And...for tonight, none of those reasons are present....sooo....what would you do if you were in my shoes?

*TMP stands for tight money policy...:p

Puncak

Wiken kmrn, barengan sama keluarga besar ipar gw, kita jalan ke puncak, nginep semalam, dr sabtu pagi mpe minggu sore. Kebetulan juga, bokap lg disini and blom pernah nginep di sana...jadilah acara jalan2 keluarga sama ponakan gue yg masih imut2 bgt.

Berangkat sabtu, rombongan 1 kk-nya ipar gw subuh2 udh jalan, trus agak siangan kloter 2 ipar gw plus Hafizh sama kk n nyokapnya, gue termasuk kloter ke-3 krn nungguin ponakan kk gw yg sekolah sulu mpe jam 9 barengan sama kk,bokap,n ponakan kk gw. Sampe Cibubur nyamperin ponakan ipar gw yg jg baru pulang sekolah, sekalin sarapan di McD....nyamnyam...sampe di tol jalanan udh lumayan macet, untungnya pas dpt giliran jalan 2 jalur...jd nyampenya lumayan cepet. Villanya sendiri ada didaerah Kota Bunga...sampe sana packing2, sholat, trus makan siang. Gag lama, kita semua jalan ke kota Bunga, jalan2 n photo2...gw yg baru sekali ini kesana, langsung terkagum2 liyat villa2 indah dilereng gunung...sambil ngayal2, kapan yah gw bisa punya villa disituh....hehehehe....disitu kita photo2 di Little Venice, ada danau, gondola...yah dibikin mirip2 sama the real Venice ceritanya..lengkap dng patung2 kuda. Dkt situ juga ada kolam renang and cultural village. Tapi kt gag masuk kedalam, krn skrg buat masuk harus bayar tiket (katanya kl dulu msh free)....

Dr Little Venice, kita terusin jalan keatas, liyat rumah2 contoh...asli keren2 bgt, dengan bermacam2 model arsitektur-nya...gag puas kita sempet juga brenti di bbrp villa, photo2 didepannya and masuk jg. Sempet liyat jg kedlm salah satu rumah contoh...aduhh...jd ngiler liyat dalamnya, soalnya pas bgt sama rumah yg gw idam2in..gaya minimalis gitu...tp ngebayangin rumah segitu aja worth 600 million IDR...duhh...kapan yah...

Balik dr kota bunga....satu mobil ke rumah sodaranya ipar gw yg tinggal didkt situ, satu mobil lagi tancap ke tempat jual duren...and gw berhubung gag suka duren langsung balik ke villa...makan bakso panas2 didepan rumah...nyamnyamm.....mandi....brrrr...udh lama ninggalin bandung, mandi dipuncak gw langsung merinding bgt...Pas semuanya udh lengkap....jam 8-an kita semua jalan lagi buat makan sate kambing ....aduh..enak bgt, satenya empuk, supnya empuk juga...pokoknya cocok bgt sama selera makan gw yg lagi menggila. Balik ke villa, kekenyangan langsung deh tidur...

Subuh2 gw udh kebangun denger suara Hafizh yg udh ngoceh2....photo2 bentar ama ponakan gw...trus bbrp dr kita jalan ke danau yg ada dkt situ, jln kaki lewat komplek villa didpn villa kita. Btw, villa di Bukit danau itu jg keren2 bgt...jd niyat, next time ke Pck pengen nginep disitu...balik ke villa sarapan nasi goreng kambing...nyamnyam...abis itu acara bebas...pd tidur2 ayam, termasuk gw...jam 12-an makan siang pake ikan nila plus sambel terasi...trus packing2 deh...

Jam 1/2 2-an kita semua cabut balik ke Jkt...brenti bentar di Telaga Warna...jalan dikit lewat kebun teh, trus ke telaganya, tempatnya keren bgt, dengan latar belakang lereng yg bagus bgt, kayak lukisan aja...sayangnya baru bentar udh mulai gerimis...photo2 bentar...trus cabut deh dr situ...sempet mampir bentar beli wortel, alpukat, ubu cilembu, peuyeum, nanas...dng harga yg murah2 bgt....terusin jalan, n berhubung udh sore, bisa dipastiin kita kena macet dimana2....termasuk di tol...ponakan gw sampe mukanya jutek bgt, mungkin gara2 dia kecapekan yah...sampe rumah jam 7-an gitu...wuihhh capek...tapi lumayan jg for a short weekend...:p

My Blogging Type

Your Blogging Type is Kind and Harmonious

You're an approachable blogger who tends to have many online friends.People new to your blogging circle know they can count on you for support.You tend to mediate fighting and drama. You set a cooperative tone.You have a great eye for design - and your blog tends to be the best looking on the block!

What's" Your Blogging Personality?

Got that one from Pipit ....and...yopp...it does sound like me....but...sometimes i would start the fighting with HIM...although at the end i will resign...heheheh...
And...definetely not the best looking blog ever...cause i just started this...:p...but i could though...in the future, make this the best looking one...xixixixiiix

Case Closed

Still remember the last entry i wrote yesterday??...yesss...about MY LANGUAGE....turned out that HIM....he didn't even like me that way!!!..(which way anyway????)...he said he didn't know me anymore (???????)....just because of that stup** kind of language i was using....

My of my...i didn't know that i would stirr some emotion inside some MALE SPECIES...so, i've come to realize that only THEY, are allowed to use those specific words....

So...i resigned...i'll just close the CASE....*cause i'm too confused to think about it anymore, and i'm afraid that i would lose my sanity*

my language..mind ya

Read the entry below?...about my so-called stupid stylist?...i did write the same status on my YM....guess guess guess....some people protested on MY LANGUAGE!!!...

What's wrong with it anyway?..i'm a grown up after all...i can do whatever i can as long as i'm responsible...i can swear using the worst word known and posted it in my blog or tagged it on my YM....so whaaatttttttttttttt....

One of a close friend, he even critisize me directly...he said he was surprised to find me with such language!!!he thought that i'm a super nice girl that wouldn't even say nasty things to people (he'd be dead if he ever gets to know me better)...hellloooooooooo....what century do we live in now??...for once in a while a girl is entittled to curse or to swear at something, including meee........mind him...but i didn't feel like i did something wrong...

But, again, maybe...they aren't used to having me with those language, so it kinda surprises them...well...well well...i'm not the bestest of girl anyway...:p...lol

Stupid Motherfu**er Hair Stylist

I've been dying to cut my hair short since couple of days ago...u know...for some of us, when our hair is no longer looking great, we don't feel confident at all...so, yesterday, i went to the last place i had when i cut my hair about 2 months ago. I got there at 6pm, i asked whether i had to wait, but they said no, they would directly cut it. They have my hair washed, and then showed me to my seat. They said, wait one moment pls....u know what...one moment turned out to be 25 minutes!!!!!...blablabla...i felt soooo mad...then here came the stylist, a woman...i got the bad feeling, cause everytime i had a woman to cut my hair...it would turn out HORRIBLY!!!!....

So i sat there, showed her the style i wanted, she said ok, that's easy, some layer....watched her did her job....and after just 20 minutes (OMG) she finished....and what i was afraid of turned to reality....it's really really awful....i didn't say thanks, din't give her any tip, cause i didn't think that she deserved it, i just walked to the chasier, paid my bill, then i left...feeling really mad and horrible...and I WOULD NEVER EVER GO BACK TO THAT PLACE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! EVER!!!!!

Almost new year

It's middle of dec now, in about no time will be new year....so fast, isn't it???...just feel like it was yesterday when i decided not to celebrate the 05 new year's eve with all my friends...instead i just stayed at home with Gretan...thx God she felt the same way, so we just went out to grab a meal at a nearby "waroeng" and then watched the fireball in front of the house and then went to sleep....I remember dearly the biggest reason why i didn't feel like it...its "the Tsunami"...that killed thousands of people in Aceh and also some countries like Maldives and Thailand. I just didn't have the heart, everyday watching those fellow people....losing all their families, home...

And now, even the new year is coming soon...i still feel that i don't want to celebrate it...the older i get, i guess the more i realize that life is more than just having fun all the time. It's more complicated than that. Life is about responsibility...to urself, ur friends, ur family, ur work, ur neighbourhood, etc. It's not easy, but we have to try, don't we???.....

Superwoman

I'm feeling really really tired....i could just close my eyes and will drift off easily...I went home to visit my father on sunday, then flew back to Jkt on monday...all with the delays, traffic jam on the highway...straight back to work yesterday...*hufffff...*....booked another tickets to fly home again tomorrow....

My father is scheduled to have a minor surgery tomorrow...and since he's all alone, and my brother couldn't care less...leaves me to arrange all things...*hufff...sigh...*.. I already got my headache back...couldn't think straight, but have to...dinner last night, i told him all about what i feel at the moment...just hope that he didn't feel sorry for me...cause that's the last thing i want from him. Thankfully, he supports me enough...or else, i dunno where else i would turn to, to help me get thru all these....

So, i will fly home tomorrow, stay at the hospital till sunday, hoping that my father's recovered, so that we all could go home...cause i'm scheduled to fly back to jkt on late sunday. I already cancelled all my plans for this weekend....*hixhixhixhix...crying quietly cause i'm supposed to be superwoman* .....1st, Tasia b'day lunch on sunday...2nd, halal bihalal with sinfulfaces...3rd, my well planned date to have dinner and movie....hixhixhixhix....well i supposed i still could do all those 2 next week...and i can have lunch or dinner together with tasia after i got back here.....alrighty...after all, my father's health is my 1st priority now...despites all things...:0)

One more thing, i have to visit Angel today at MMc, she's hospitalized yesterday...well she works hard...but she also parties harder....hope she's getting better soon...

greasy cheesy melty ...

I've craved that greasy cheesy bla3 burger for days...it might be caused by my PMS syndrome...so yesterday, which happened to be his birthday, he granted me my wish, i could have that cheesy greasy burger for dinner....yihaaaaaa..

Actually, our first plan for yesterday was to have dinner at PB* (we have wanted to dine here, but never made it, so we decided that on his B, we would dine there) to celebrate his birthday. But, i also got my period yesterday, so i didn't feel like dining out in a fancy place. Fortunately, since morning he also talked about the 'supposed to be birthday present" that i haven't gotten him yet (we already knew what it was going to be hehehe :p)...then i told him that we didn't have to dine, instead we could go to get the present.....well..as u girls all know...inside every man is a boy....he finally agreed with me...after asking me for zillion times whether it was okay for me not to have dinner at the time...silly man!!!!....

He picked me up at the office at 6pm, then we went directly to MKG, looked inside every sportstores in that place (which is huge...hixhixhix)...he couldn't decide which one to get, cause everything looked so cool...then he said that we should get dinner first, all the while he would do the thinking and make the decision as to which one to buy. We went to Raffels at 3rd fl, i got myself a big beef and cheddar melt along with fries and ice tea. He ordered rice, roasted chicken, soup and also ice tea. When they came...darrn... i could feel that i was droolled all over it...heheheheh.....it was big, full with roasted beef and that melted cheese...soooo yummy....i can imagine it now that i must have been looked like a girl who hasn't eaten for a week...:p....but it was good i tell ya....i will get it again this weekend...hehehehhe...

After finishing our dinner, we went back again to those stores...we liked one red Filla but couldn't get the right size though we have moved to the other store. Finally, after moments of doubt, he chose a white Ree, the newest edition...Thanks God...

He smiled all the way to my house, he got his birthday present he've been dreaming of...i was glad....in the car, in front my house, we lit the candle on the little birthday cake i got him earlier...he made a wish...and then he blew the candle....it was perfect...just a perfect thing to end a perfect day....

HAPPY BIRTHDAY VIC...

Happy birthday to you, this is your day.
On this day for you we’re gonna love you in every way.
This is your day, your day, happy birthday to you, to you, to you.

Happy birthday to you, you’re still young.
Age is just a number, don’t you stop having fun.
This is your day, your day, happy birthday to you.
This day only comes once every year,
Because you’re so wonderful with each and everything you do, hey!
Happy birthday to you, this is your day.

On this day for you we’re gonna love you in every way.
This is your day, your day, happy birthday to you, to you.
This day is only for you, ’cause you’re so special in every way,
Happy birthday to you!

Happy bday yah pip...getting older, be wiser

sukses2, sehat2, selalu dilindungi

oleh Allah SWT, aminn..

Two Things for Tuesday

I found this over when i browse over some blogs...pretty funny...

2 names you go by:hence, hen

2 parts of your heritage:javanese and Javanese..:p

2 things that scare you:worm and lonely

2 of your everyday essentials:a shower and a cup of coffee

2 things you are wearing right now:earings my mom bought me when i entered Uni and my watch, a present from him...

2 of your favorite bands or musical artists (at the moment):alicia Keys and U2

2 favorite songs (at the moment):"Hurricane"(eric benet) and Kissing a Fool (george michael)

2 things you want in a relationship (other than real love):honesty and trust

2 truths:i wish my family's still together now and I....

2 physical things that appeal to you (in the opposite sex):eyes and laugh

2 of your favorite hobbies:taking photos and reading

2 things you want really badly:a new job and a new car....hahaha

2 places you want to go on vacation:africa and middle east

2 things you want to do before you die:go to Mecca for pilgrimage and join fof safari in Kenya

2 ways that you are stereotypically a dude/chick:i am very moody and sometimes i cry easily

2 things you are thinking about now:my constant headache and my father

2 stores at which you shop:centro, sogo, itc (more than 2???)

Thank You

Thank you for being my friend all those (past) times...
Thank you for cheering up my (old) days...

Thank you for NOT making the time for me...
Thank you for NOT being there for me when i needed you most...
Thank you for NOT appreciating me the way i should be...
Because you have always taken me for granted...

Thank YOU for (finally) making me realize that you are NOT the one for me...

Thank You...

Writer Wannabe

I love to write...mostly about my everyday life...about my family, my work, my friends, and also about about my love life. I've written diary since elementary school, writing girly sissy things, mostly 'bout my crush i had, but i stopped when my brother read them aloud in front of my parents and some of my cousins. I was so embarrased i burned my diary. Then i started writing again in high school, with still the same topic, boyfriends, girlfriends, school, etc. But, again it stopped when i finished HS.

Then i moved to another city to continue my study, living alone away from my family. Sounded like a perfect opportunity for me to start writing again, but i didn't write anything at all, except for all the duty papers from classes. No more silly things, nothing.

After graduating, i then moved to other city, the one i live in now...started working like everyone else. Four years later, i'm still working in this same old company....and lately, it makes me wonder, where the hell have i been all these years...i have this free internet access 24 hours a day, i have this free flexible time to manage by myself, but i have never ever used this facility to learn or try to write again....mannn...this hit me so hard in the face...!!!!....

A year ago, i started to write my own blog, then i deleted it because i was soo embarrased reading all those entries....they were all RUBBISH....damnn....i even couldn't write well....i started to compare those with other people's blog...it made mo so envy why others could write so well...flowing...just like water....

Then...i made my 2nd blog few months ago...this time i say to myself that i'm okay, i could deal with this...finally i've come to realize that, 1st, some people were born to write, just like that, u can't envy them, it's a gift...and 2nd, some people have to learn to write...maybe i'm included...so what...everything can be learnt......so i started writing again, beginning with little things still....my work, my family, my friends, my love, and my life....who knows....in the next coming years....(dunno when).....i will be able to write my own book....whether it be romance novel or my own otobiography....hehehhehe.....one thing i learn...we have to start somewhere to make it happen....

Be My ***

be my ***

since i've known you babe
you brought a light for me
but taste of ur sincerity
build me a world to believe

but still there's a doubt
in u for loving me
though deep down inside
u'll see what's in me

be my ***
be the one
and good things will come
to our heart

you're my ***
you're my one
give me a little chances
to show you love

*to whom i love the most*

Cerita abis lebaran

Ramadhan udh lewat bbrp minggu...lebaran juga...hati jd bertanya2, kira2 tahun depan masih dikasih umur panjang sama Allah gag yah...buat bisa ngerasain indahnya Ramadhan n Idul Fitri...InsyaAllah...semoga yah...

Lebaran gag pulang kampung...ada enak dan enggak nya juga...Enaknya...pertama, Alhamdullilah...bokap bisa dirayu2 buat berlebaran disini...heheheheh.....dengan alasan ponakan gw msh terlalu kecil buat diajak pergi2 jauh...hehehehe jadi bokap dng berbesar hati datang ke Jkt....yang kedua...bisa irit...karena gag harus beli tiket yang bisa jadi luarbiasa mahal gara2 tuslah...ketiga, gw gag harus beli baju baru hahahhaha....alhasil gw bisa dgn suksesnya pake baju taun krmn...who cares anyway...ya gag sihh....

Trus...gag enaknya...pertama, sedih aja karena gag bisa nyekar ke makam nyokap....udh lumayan lama gag pulang, terakhir bulan April kmrn....jd sedih aja, soalnya ini lebaran ke3 beliau meninggalkan kami...kedua, gag bisa kumpul2 sama keluarga besar nyokap gue, jd gw cukup denger ditelp aja pas gw telp budhe seabis sholat Ied...ketiga, berhubung pembantu2 dirmh kakak gw pada mudik...yah gw mendadak n harus secara sukarela jd upik abu...alias bagi2 kerjaan rumah...which can be very hard kl udh kebagian babysitting, soalnya my adorable nephew yg msh 5 bulan itu superhiperactive...hihihihi...kebayang kan...gag bisa cuman jagain disebelahnya aja sambil baca2 or nonton tv, soalnya si Hafizh, maunya SELALU BERDIRI...padahal dia lom bisa berdiri, boro2 berdiri, balikin badan dr tengkurang ke telentang aja dia lom bisa...jd tau dong ngapain...gw musti megangin badannya yg kebetulan juga cukup gede buat ukuran bayi 5 bln...hihihi...jd kmrn2 itu gw sekalian ngencengin lengan gw...udh gt dia termasuk chatty baby, harus selalu diajak ngobrol, kl enggak bisa tiba2 nangis...hehehe...seharian bisa bikin tenggorokan gw super kering, krn kl gag ngobrol yah gw harus nyanyi lagu2 anak2...berkali2 dan terus diulang2.....*OMG....heheheh...thank goodness i love him, kl gag bisa gw gigit tuh bocah yg super chubby pipinya..:p...*

Yang pasti sih, lebaran kmrn cukup seru...meski agag sepi, yang bikin gw udh gatel pengen jalan2 aja pas lebaran kedua...which was not succesfull..soalnya mall yg gw tuju msh tutup...heheheh...gw berdoa semoga aja...lebaran tahun depan gw bisa mudik ke kampung halaman...barengan sama sodara gue...gpp deh kena macet berat kayak yg gw alamin thn kmrn....sama sedokur gue terperangkap didlm mobil dr jumat malam ampe minggu pagi...yg kalo diinget2 bikin gw senep juga...hehehehe...but hey...It's Lebaran...klo gag pake mudik n macet kayaknya gag lengkap.....cheersssss

Minal Aidin Wal Faidzin..

Selamat Hari Raya

Idul Fitri 1426 H

Minal Aidin Wal Faidzin...

Mohon Maaf Lahir dan Batin

Semoga amal ibadah kita

Diterima oleh Allah SWT

Aminnnn....

what a day...

Kayaknya baru hari kedua puasa...tp yg namanya godaan...banyaakkk bgtt....yang namanya diomelin customer....ya Allah...i had it enough deh for today...astaghfirrulah....dr tadi kl gag inget puasa,...pengen banget yang ngamuk2...galak2 banget....aduhhhh...udh pengen nangisssssss....lagi tengah2 ngomong, diputus telp ampe dua kali....ada juga cust boong2, bilang udh faks, ternyata blm...aduhhh.....orang2 kow pada gag punya etika yaaaa

u know what...pengen cepet balik kerumah....buka puasa and ketemu and maen2 sama my really adorable nephew Hafizh ...:p.....he's such an angel...:-)...padahal mestinya gue ntar sore ada arisan bareng anak dirumah Lala....tp berhubung gue males bgt buka puasa diluar, pengen pulang, n ngantug berat...plus ngebayangin pulang ke rumah sendirian ntar malem....huhhhh....nope, i can't do it...

Marhaban Ya Ramadhan

Marhaban Ya Ramadhan....

Today, hari pertama puasa...Alhamdullilah, bisa ketemu bulan yang panuh rahmat ini lagi. Seneng plus sedih....senengnya, dibulan ini kita bisa memperbanyak amal ibadah kita, bisa berintrospeksi diri lagi (meski gag harus pas bulan puasa doang sih)....trus dikit lagi lebaran...udh ngebayangain pulang kampung abis lebarannya....sedihnya...ini ramadhan ketiga tanpa nyokap...jd inget waktu nyokap gag ada dua tahun yang lalu, pas udh mo deket2 puasa....jd inget sedih2nya....tp yah...life must go on...and gue juga yakin, Insyaallah nyokap udh tenang disisi-Nya...amin.

Puasa..jam kerja kantor jadi maju...masuk jam 1/2 8, pulang jam 4...enak sih...soalnya skrg, sejak gue tinggal dirumah kakak gue, biasa jam 1/2 8 juga gue udh sampe ktr....lumayan lah...meskipun, today, cos gag bisa ngupi...pas jam 8-9an...hadohhh..ngantukk beratsss bow....untung aja kerjaan lumayan banyak...jd gue gag ada waktu buat bermalas2an lagi.....skrg udh agag mendingan, jd gue bisa nge-blog bentar dehh...:p...

Ngomongin puasa lagi....pasti yg ada di benak kita....hmmm...makan apa yah buat buka ntar sore....hehehehhe.....kayaknya udh wajib bgt yah....palagi kl mo ada acara buka puasa bersama...waduhh...langsung semangat bgt, milih2 tempat yang paling enak n nyaman...buat chatty2 abis buka puasa....gue juga udh mulai mikir2 nih...acara buka2 bareng...sama2 temen2 nongkrong, temen2 arisan, temen2 kuliah...temen2 kantor...sama yayang..(hihihihih)....banyak yah....tetep aja yah...niyat o hemat pas bulan puasa jd gag hemat juga...kebanyakan makan diluar....tp, kl dipikir lagi....point utamanya kan silaturahminya itu....sama temen2 yang masih satu kota aja, kadang ampe berbulan2 bisa gag ketemu krn kesibukan masing2....

Jadi...disini...gue pengen ngucapin....mohon maaf lahir dan batin...selamat menjalankan ibadah puasa dan semoga segala amal ibadah kita diterima oleh Allah SWT, amin..

Binun

Bingung nih....mo nulis apaan...:p

Tapi....ada sesuatu sih yang mengganggu pikiran gue.....kayak klo ada orang yang mendadak berubah sikap ke gue..sementara gue gag ngerti kenapa orang itu kayak gitu ke gue....tadinya gag ada apa2....suka cerita2, ngobrol2 dikit....becanda2....tiba2 beberapa bulan belakangan gue ngerasa sikapnya beda ke gue....
Dia jadi jutek gitu....kalo papasan jadi gag negor....padahal gue siap2 pasang senyum....i'm talking about male species here....padahal dia dulunya salah satu orang yg cukup deket sama gue...gag pernah lagi becanda sama gue....padahal dia bisa dengan asiknya ketawa2 sama sebelah gue.....gue jd mikir...what did i do wrong?....gue ngelakuin apa yah yg bikin dia kayak gitu....or gue ngomong apa yah sama dia...sampe dia bt bgt gitu...kl cuman sekedar gosip2, maksud gue kl mis dia denger sesuatu ttg gue yg nyangkut dia dlm konotasi negatif, itu kan blom tentu bener yah...mendingan konfirmasi langsung deh sama gue...bener atau enggak.....jangan mendadak kayak gini ...maunya gue....

Tapi-nya lagi....perubahan sikap itu, jadi bikin gue mikir juga....cos something happened few days ago......yang bikin gue bengong...trus jd nanya ke diri gue sendiri....what's wrong with him????.....apa mendingan gue tanya aja yah ke dia....tp gue takut kl dia malah jd geer....jadi....gimana dong yah.....????....

&%*)$#@

)*&%#$@&*^%....more and more headache....more heartache...dunno who's or what to blame...might this be the right time to move on???....i'm so brokenhearted to even start sumthin'....

i'm screamingggg.....no air left in my lungs....i'm fainted.........*blackness*

HOLIDAY-part-two

Berhubung kita udh ketinggalan sunset, akhirnya qta nerusin poto2, trus cabut ke mcD buat makan malem. Trus pulang deh....acara bebas...tp gue tetep semangat aja jalan menyusuri legian....:p...ampe telerrrr

Besoknya, kita jalan lagi ke pasar seni Sukowati, sekalian ke celuk liat kerajinan perak2an gitu. Judulnya juga cewek, liyat pasar dengan barang2 yang keren n harga murah2...wah...langsung deh jd pada kalap...gue gag termasuk loh....gue cuman beli beberapa sendal manik2, kaos2, kalung2, cermin, pritil2 gitu buat oleh2 aja....tp temen2 gue yang lain...wadoh....semua kayaknya dibeli...dr bedcover yang segede2 gaban sampe salak bali berkilo2 juga dibeli....ujung2nya...bagasi mobil...penuhhhhh......lanjut ke Celuk...sampe situh pada sibuk nyoba2in cincin segala macem....gag lama disitu, baru ada yg inget kl ada yg kelupaan dibeli disukowati...alhasil...sore2 kita balik lagi ke sana...OMG.....ujung2nya....I MISSED THE SUNSET AGAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!...soalnya lg dijalan otw back to kuta....jd liyat sunset dijalan....hiks...hiks...balik ke hotel, anak2 pada turun...gue, angel, sama anes lanjut ke HR hotel, mo cari souvenir buat adeknya angel. Gag lama disana, erwin temen chatting angel datang....gag lama temen gue Eka, ex-finance kantor gue yg diDps telp, nanya gue lg dimana. Gag lama eka dateng, kita, minus erwin setelah sebelumnya janjian besok pagi ketemu buat nyari kaos surfing, lanjut dinner ke Jimbaran....wuihhhhhhhhh....keren bgtt...makan seafood dipinggir laut plus lilin2 plus lagi lagu2 romantis yang dinyayiin live. WISH I WAS THERE WITH SOMEONE SPECIAL....hueheuehueheue.....pulang dr jimbaran, ke HR lagi, liyat live music di centerstage....kerennn....jam 11-an kita balik ke hotel soalnya udh ditelponin sama anak2 yang lain...(yg sampe detik ini gag tau kl kita ber3 sempet ke jimbaran...heheheheh)....

Hari terakhir, pagi2 gue cabut ma angel ma erwin, nyari kaos2 surf....otw, mampir dulu b'fast di kuta galeria, di Cherry cafe, langganannya erwin...coffe lattenya..hmmm..yummy...gag rugi deh....bis itu langsung ke by pass..ketemu tokonya, liyat2, langsung jd ikutan napsu (padahal gue gag ngefans...cuman nyari titipan oleole buat seseorang...:p)...cos harganya lebih murah and original lagi...Balik ke hotel, siap2 checkout, nitipin barang direception, cos flight kita msh ntar jam 10mlm....trus kita jalan ke Teuku Umar buat cari nasi bali....udh jauh2 gag ketemu juga, akhirnya kita makan ayam taliwang...hehehe...gag nyambung yah...dr situ lanjut ke Kuta Square, jalan2 di pasar seni kuta, sempet beli kalung and baju lagi...hehehehe....trus udh deh nongkrong lah kita di pantai Kuta, yg kata orang keren abis itu,....sampe sunset...AKHIRNYA....balik ke hotel jam 7, cucimuka dll, jam 1/2 8 temen gue jemput buat anterin ke airport...wadohh...tas gue berat bgtt yah bow.....say daag2 an gituh...trus check in....makan di kfc, nunggu boarding....yg telat 1/2 jam, akhirnya jam 10 pswt brkt...dingin bgt yah bow...pswtnya..mana gue pake celana selutut doang gag bawa jaket, gag bisa tdr deehh...sampe Cgk jam 1/2 11wib, nunggu bagasi lama.....naik damri cos gag ada yg dijemput sama sekali...untung rame2 ber7....ganti naik taksi dr tanahabang..sampe rumah..jam..1/2 1...........weks....cuapekkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk....BUT I DID HAVE FUN.....THERE.....PENGENNN BALIKK LAGII...SOOONN...:p

headache

I'm constantly having this stupid headache...today....i couldn't see straight, couldn't think properly...barely able to open my eyes since i took two pills for this crazy head....

I really am having a bad day....i hate my co****** for doing things like owning this damn company....i hate my old boardhouse for trying to get my things out of the way....damnnn....i hate all the people i work with at the moment......i hate this cursed pla** which has been my 2nd home for the way things work out for me lately....above all...i hate my gut for feeling like this.... :( :( :(....*hoping that i'll get my sanity back just in time*

HooDoo

Last saturday...i intended to buy new wardrobe for my new room...so we went to one of hypermart located in a mall in Semanggi area. After looking around at some of them...we decided to see a movie in that same place. Haven't gone to theatre for some time...we bought the ticket for Skeleton Key starring by Kate Hudson.

Setting in New Orleans, the film tells us about Hoodoo....it's not a religion...more like a belief...mostly by black american from Africa. It's not a scarry movie...but sometimes it gives you surprises...

Overall...it's hmm...refreshing...with that sexy Kate Hudson...it's not great movie...but if you feel like going out this week...and want to see something....i guess this one is the right choice.

HOLIDAY-part-one

Long weekend kemaren,...setelah dengan penuh bujuk rayu dr temen2 arisan gue heheheh........akhirnya gue cabut juga ke bali rame2, lumayan mendadak sih krn tadinya udh gag dapet tiket...ternyata didetik2 terakhir dpt juga tiket murah, makanya hari sabtu br berangkat...telat yah boww.....bertujuh, 2 co (yg satu diragukan sih...heheheeh)...plus 5 cewek....plus lagi...disana udh ada 2 orang yang nungguin juga...satu anak arisan...satunya lagi temen kost-nya angel.

Berangkat sabtu sore, sampe sana udh malem...jam 9-an lewat...check in di bungalow dilegian...jam 11 malem mulai deh tuh acara jalan....soalnya udh laper bgt....acara jalan pertama kita langsung ke warung made....berhubung udh late at night, pesenan nasi goreng kita jadi last order deh disitu....ternyata lagi, rasanya so so aja...gag sesuai sama namanya yg beken ituh...tp krn emang lagi laper berat (di pswt kita gag dpt kue boww...kebayang dongg..)....habis juga tuh nasgor dlm porsi besar.....sempet foto2 juga disitu...judulnya juga banci kamera tuh anak2....tempatnya lumayan keren...kelar makan, kita balik lagi ke kamar....udh capek bgt...plus gag ada lagi yg bisa diliat dilegian selain bar2 itu....jd kita memutuskan buat tidur aja...hemat energi buat besok2 nya....

Minggu pagi, abis b'fast diresto hotel, kita ber8 plus Suga (tmn kost angel) cabut ke Tanah Lot (siang2 bolong boww)....tp krn rame2 tetep aja semangat...sampe sana tetep foto2....trus...belanjaaaaaaaaa.....tas2nya keren2...si angel beli ampe banyakkk bener....ujung2nya hari terakhir satu tas pindah ke gue, cos dia kebanyakan and gue kekurangan oleh2...hehehhehe....jam 1an kita cabut ke sanur beach hotel buat lunch bareng sama salah satu anak arisan yg kebetulan udh stay disana sama cowoknya....bfast ditepi pantai ....lucu juga....banyak bul2 yang lucu lagi pada sunbathing....heheheheh....kelar makan, kita langsung cabut ke Benoa...niatnya pengen liat tempat penangkaran penyu...tp berhubung udh kesorean n air lagi surut, gag jadi deh kita naik motorboat...soalnya kl maksain, kita musti jalan 10kilo, just to see those tortoise...makkkkk.....akhirnya kita memutuskan buat liat sunset di Jimbaran...berhubung masih aga2 siang, kita main2 air doang disana plus minum es kelapa muda dipinggir pantai. Nunggu sunset lama...kita jadinya balik ke Kuta...niatnya liat sunset disituh...sampe kuta kita ke HR Hotel dulu...foto2 lagi....masuk ke dalem hotel liat souvenir shopnya...foto2 lagi...alhasil...kita jadi KETINGGALAN SUNSET....damnnnnnnnnnnnn....

to be continued....

new place

Since my landlady passed away, I've been thinking over and over, like 1000x.....my brother's offer to move to his house.....2 days ago finally i decided to say yes to his offer...big decision...tomorrow is actually the big day....so many things to do...haven't done it, but i'm tired already....i have so many small belongings, like books etc....and it kinda freaks me out everytime...so many boxes...should have given them up to charity i guess.....*remind me to do it next*

Plus, i need to buy new wardrobe, cause don't have one....ASAP...got to do it tomorrow...too....plus, i have a date 2morrow....leaving me with big ?.....cause...how the he*l would i do all that properly....in one day...remembering that my bro's house is not exactly next door...aka...lil bit far from my board house now...

I could do it on sunday, alone...but since i depend on my helper....to do all the lifting...then i'll just have to do it 2morrow...no packing yet...guess...i will not sleep tonight....

so...anyone...care to give me a hand????....:p....

someone new (by eskobar)

So is it goodbye?
Is it time to set you free?
Is it time to let it fly?
Is it time to let it bleed?

We used to take turns
To cover up the pain
Deep below it burns
And the fellin' still remains

You're gonna find someone new
I really hope you do
'Cause I love you
And the sun will come on thru,
It's gonna shine for you
'Cause I adore you

Yes we gave it a try
But maybe for too long
Out of every sorrow
Another day will dawn

You're gonna find someone new
I really hope you do
'Cause I love you
And the sun will come on thru,
It's gonna shine for you
'Cause I adore you

And the road travels on
But I'm still near you
In my life, like a song
I will still hear you
Still

Sun will shine for you
'Cause I adore you...

broken

I wanted you to know I love the way you laugh
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain away
I keep your photograph; I know it serves me well
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain

‘Cause I’m broken when I'm open
And I don’t feel like i am strong enough
'Cause I'm broken when I'm lonsome
And i don't feel rite when your gone away

You're gone away; You don't feel me here anymore

The worst is over now and we can breathe again
I wanna hold you high, you steal my pain away
There’s so much left to learn, and no one left to fight
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain

‘Cause I’m broken when I’m open
And I don’t feel like I am strong enough
‘Cause I’m broken when I’m lonesome
And I don’t feel right when you’re gone away

‘Cause I’m broken when I’m open
And I don’t feel like I am strong enough
‘Cause I’m broken when I’m lonesome
And I don’t feel right when you’re gone away

‘Cause I’m broken when I’m lonesome
And I don’t feel right when you’re gone away
You're gone away; You don't feel me here anymore.

berita duka

Minggu kemaren....pas hari kemerdekaan Indonesia....Ibu kost gue yang tercinta menghembuskan napas terakhir dirumah sakit....beliau udah lumayan berumur sih, 71 tahun, n sakit tumor di perut. Ceritanya sih, dr beberapa bulan yang lalu udah diops, tapi ternyata sekitar 2minggu yglalu, beliau msk rs lagi krn tumornya udh nyebar kemana2. Sedihnya, mas Ery, anak ibu satu2nya gag bisa balik, cos msh di US...rencana akhir bulan ini baru bisa balik ke Indo.

Sedihnya lagi, itu ngingetin sama waktu nyokap gue gag ada.....udh lama sih....tapi tetep aja....:(....

Udah gitu, kamar gue kan deket bgt sama kamar Bu Riyanto....yang ada gue jd agak2 takut...apalagi buat pulang malem...alhasil, dr hari jumat gue ngabur ke tempat kakak gue n baru balik tadi pagi, mandi, langsung kerja.....benernya sih, gue bukannya takut....gue cuma sedikit gag tahan sama suasana-nya....muram....penuh kesedihan....it's just too much....for me to bear at the moment....tapi ntar sore juga gue musti pulang ke kost....

Tapi, buat kakak gue, kejadian ini justru bikin dia tambah semangat buat maksa2 gue pindah kerumahnya....hal yang sekarang bikin gue pusing....thinking about it over and over again...but still couldn't find the answer, yet.....

sebell

Gue lagi sebel bgt sama seseorang...asli, gue males bgt denger namanya disebut, liat orangnya apalagi....

Tapi, dr kejadian itu, justru gue bisa liat beberapa hal yang sebelumnya gag pernah gue perhatiin....nyadarin gue, kl gue selama ini nutup sebelah mata gue...hal yg seharusnya gag gue lakuin....tp, kadang2 memang we just think with our heart not our head....so, what should i do about it????

weekend

Wiken kmrn....gue janjian sama anak2 sinful faces buat ketemuan bagi2 cd carita....rencana semula sih mo diplangi....tp dian inget kl ada final indon idol....kebayang kan ramenya bakal kayak apaa...jd akhirnya kita mutusin buat ganti venue aja....usul punya usul...akhirnya kita deal buat janjian di pisa kafe yg ada disetiabudi building jam 6sore...which was advantageous to me, cause deket bgt sama ktr and kost gue, alias gue bisa naik ojek aaja kesana.....

Jam 6 kurang gue masih diktr, msh sok busy sibuk telp2an...:p.....sampe Sari sms bil kl udh sampe n sapa aja yg udh disana...hehehe..langsung aja gue cabs sebelum diprotes...ditengah jalan Haris telp nanya arah...sebelah mananya setiabudi plasa...weleh....lieur....sampe sana Sari udh nunggu di deket air mancur...nunggu Haris...akhirnya ber3 nyari tempat....wiken bow...penuh semua....akhirnya kita dapet tempat di Amadeus....sambil nunggu Dian and Babe....kita ngobrol2 dulu deh...sambil gag lupa bernarcist2 ria alias poto2..:p.....sampe ber5 ngumpul2....pengen makan, tp ternyata bambang juga ya bow....gag ikhlas deh kayaknya keluarin duit...hehehe...akhirnya Dian ngusulin buat makan seafood didaerah santa....akhirnya jam 8.30pm, kita cabs....Haris naro motor dikost-an gue....babe balik dng alasan jemput yg "syah"....sumpeee....trus kita ber4 jalan ke santa....dijalan telp Dory yg lagi masuk malem....ehh gag diangkat2 (turned out ada story behind...)....yasuw...makan ber4....ternyata enak bgt....udang, cumi, n ikan bakarnya....yummy bgt...makan jd banyak...gue gag tau, emang krn perut laper bgtt, masakan yg cihuy...ato emang kita yg makannya banyak yah...????....hehhehhe...yg pasti sih cihuy bgt...(gue udh ada rencana buat kesana lagi minggu ini...hehehehhe).....

Cabut dr situ, telp dory lagi, cos tempatnya udh deket sama ktr dory.....untung dia ada...jadilah kita mampir diktr-nya....nongkrong dibawah ditangga depan...tetep ketawa2 sambil photo2....hehehehe.....untung aja gag diusir sama security-nya yg banyak bgt duduk diparkiran....gag berasa udh jam 11 lewat....mata gue udh kabur2 gag puguh, perih pengen nyopot softlense gue.....Sari ma Dian msh napsu juga buat jalan, malah pengen karaoke segala....untung aja...Haris yg rumahnya nun jauh di Priuk sono musti balik....(kayaknya bawa sendok emaknya tuh).....akhirnya sepakat karaoke jd agenda minggu depan....which is minggu ini...(oh my...i'm running out of...)....

Balik...lewat gatsu, nungguin Dian dapet taksi....trus ke kost-an gue.....pas masuk kamar...gue liat jam...oh noo...udah jam 11.30pm...gag berasa aja.....

choice

Semalem, gue nemenin pot rambut vicvic di salah satu tempat ngafe dijakarta (???....ada tpt pot rambutnya lageee...:p)...sambil iseng2 nunggu dia kelar....gue liat2 free magazine yg disediain ditempat itu....buka2 bentar trus gue bawa majalahnya.....tutup lagi cos kita lg muter2 mikir mo makan apa....dapet tempat, nunggu pesenan, buka2 lagi majalah itu...masih belom ngeh juga...makan....ngobrol....trus pulang ke kost....

Baca novel....trus bosen...akhirnya gue buka lagi itu free mag....guess what...untung aja gue buka2...krn ternyata isinya....oke bgt....kl menurut gue....ada suatu artikel tentang "choice"....dikupas dikit tentang dilemma yang selalu menghiasi hidup manusia.....kenapa manusia kadang begitu sulit untuk menghadapi dilemma yang ada....

Sedikit banyak, artikel itu ngebuka mata gue....kadang2 kl lagi ngadepin dilemma, yg terlihat didepan kita cuma yang jelek2nya aja....jd gag bisa mikir rasional....padahal...yg seharusnya kita lakuin....pertimbangin dulu positif negatifnya...timbang2...mana yg lebih positif...baru deh kita bisa ambil keputusan...karena kalau dibiarin berlarut2, malahan bikin kita tambah stress aja...

Btw....dimajalah itu, gue juga nemuin quotes yang oke ...
"Destiny is no matter of chance. It is a matter of choice. It is not a thing to be waited for, it is a thing to be achieved" (W.J. Bryan)...

Jad, apapun yang terjadi sama kita...in my opinion...it's our own choice...

what kind of syndrome is this????

kmrn, gue akhirnya tepar juga....setelah berminggu2 gag enak body....tetep gue paksain ngantor...jalan...keliling2....akhirnya pulang dr carita...pusing kepala gue tambah menjadi2...gue ampe bingung whut's wrong with my head anyway.....jd, kmrn gue gag masuk kantor...cause i couldn't stand it anymore....

udh nge-boat, gag bikin gue lebih baik....yg tambah bikin parah...kenapa juga pas gue sakit kepala gini, gue tiba2 juga berasa feeling blue...sedih mulu...gue gag tau emang ini gejala2 orang sakit....atau gue lg kena n*****s b********n....aduhh.....gag enak bgt....

udah gitu....the closest person i have juga gag sensitif bgt...i feel neglected...:((....i feel alone....my oh my...

numb

just like what i posted earlier this morning....
hari ini berasa gag enak bgt....it's not that i'm being moody, it's just that, i'm supposed to feel happy..but I AM NOT HAPPY AT ALL...i just got back from a short holiday on the beach with my friends yesterday...something i've been waiting for...but, the truth is...on our way home...i just felt numb...to the bone...

i had fun there...we played bodyboard...walked on the beach...took a leisurely nap on the pool side (geez, wish i could do it anytime..:p)...listened to the sound of the water....the tides....felt so great....first....but then...just numb....i just realize, something struck my mind there...that nothing lasts forever....and i'm just scared...I AM...

blueee...

...i'm feeling so blue...dunno why....

Turn down the lights

turn down the bed

turn down these voices inside my head

lay down with me

tell me no lies

just hold me close

don't patronize

don't patronize me

I can't make you love me

if you don't

you can't make your heart feel

something it won't

here in the dark

these final hours

I will lay down my heart

I feel the power

but you won't

no, you won't

And I can'tmake you love me

if you don't

I close my eyes

then I won't see

the love you don't feel

when you're holding me

morning will come

and I'll do what's right

just give me til then

to give up this fight

And I will give up this fight

Cause I can't make you love me

if you don't

you can't make your heart feel

something it won't

here in the dark

these final hours

I will lay down my heart

I feel the power

but you won't

No, you won't

and I can't make you love me

if you don't

There ain't no use in you trying

if you don't love me Baby!

ain't no use in you trying

if you don't

if you don't

if you don't

if you don't love me

there ain't nothing I can do

???

the feeling is so overwhelming...

you feel you might die drowning...

have you ever wondered...

what you might have become...

if you were born someone else????

have you ever felt so miserably failed in your life...????

bindi

gue punya bindi nihh.....ditengah garis hidung gue antara mata kanan dan mata kiri...gara2nya...dr kemaren, abis makan siang, gue sakit kepala banget,....pulang tidur, didn't help....minum panadol, didn't help either, akhirnya saking gag tahan, gue pijit2 sendiri.....trus tidur....

tadi pagi....abis mandi, lagi ngaca....ya ampunn...ada garis merah ditengah2 hidung gue....sampe skrg gag ilang juga...dr pagi udh jadi bahan ledekan aja gue....betenya lagi...gue masih aja pusing2 padahal td siang gue udh minum panadol juga..hiks hiks...whuts' wrong with me...?????

akhirnya rencana liburan jadi juga....tp sebagai eo tdk resmi, gue agag lieur juga...cos, tadinya ada yg mau pulang pagi...cos musti kerja, tp ternyata gag jd....tp ternyata ada lagi nih yg pengen pulang pagi cos mau ada kondangan kawinan jam 11 siang????....how's that possible, gue gag tau, cos carita kan gag deket2 amat ke jkt...at least 2,5 - 3 jam lah yaaa.....kl mo kondangan jam segitu, pikir aja musti berangkat jam berapa....mana harus nyalon dulu buat pake konde dll...

gue udh curhat2 sama salah satu anak....akhirnya dia bilang, yah gimana...there's nothing u can do...soalnya gag mungkin juga gue harus ngorbanin anak2 yg lain dengan ngajakin pulang pagi...demi 1 anak aja....ya nggak???....atau kalau musti voting, kayaknya juga udh ketahuan deh hasilnya....mana ada yg mau pulang pagi2...sementara didepan loe, pantainya menggoda iman bgttt......geezzz....i don't have a clue....
jadi...gue gag tau deh, musti gimana...gue sih udh kasih tau...let her make the decision....kl menurut gue sih...kayaknya gag enak juga kalo dia gag ikutan....krn dr awal juga udh rame2 bikin rencananya...cuman...yah ituh tadi...there's nothing more i could do....

mualesss

today=males bgttttt....
gag tau kenapa, yang pasti males bgt kerja...tray gue udh ampe penuh tp gue bener2 gag ada hasrat (ciyeh...)buat sortir2....alhasil dr tadi gue input2 gag kelar2....tiap liat angka2, aduh....langsung pusing....hiks...browsing=udh ampe munmun dunno what else to look for....

jadi kesimpulannya, gue pengen pulang and tidur cepet....kalo bisa besok pagi gag usah masuk kantor...hmmm...tp bisa nggak yah???....i'm so sick with myself for being to diligent sometimes...

this stupid stupid feeling

i'm soo mad cause i' having this stupid cramps...since last nite...couldn't sleep well...constantly having nightmares...sumtimes i'm thinking about this thing that we, women, have to have...it's not that i'm complaining...but...it's the ever changing mood, the cramps...the crankiness...blablabla....oh geez.....

this plan to carita also makes me feel bad...cause, sum people want to stay at marbella, but with limited budget we will have to stay at one room...with 8people...geezz, .......we can rent with cheaper rate (i got it in the net), but still...if you do not reserve some place thru' it's official channel...sometimes it makes you wonder whether all things are going to be okay...after all...it's vacation...we wouldn't want anything to be not okay.....but, thank goodness some are wiser by choosing cheaper and bigger place with the same budget...think i'm going with the 2nd choice...cause, for me, it's not about the place.......

nnn....i'm lil bit confused now...someone offered me a job...it's in the other island....very tempting and beautiful one....it's not that i got the job already....i still have to go thru' the interview ect....but....already, last night i gave lots of thought bout it...whether i have enough courage to leave all these behind me...starting new life there...i want to move from this company i'm currently working at...but, moving to other city as well as other island is not the same with just moving to other company....here....i already discussed this with someone...and the decision is that i'll go with the interview process, if i get the job and the salary is okayy...i'll move...and then after couple of months...i'll go back here, to jakarta....!!!!...God...what kind of decision is that???.....wouldn't i waste my time...my energy...to do something halfway like that???? actually that's not my decision, it's his decision, considering what??...i dunno....me, myself, still wondering, what i'll decide and do...

days gone by

i had hectic days these last 2 weeks....not just work, which is getting more and more into my nerve by days....had lots in my mind...couldn't think straight...refusing tempting offer to go out with my friends....just wanted to have lots of sleep...i did have actually...quite refreshing..... went out just couple of times, dining out with my friends, having a cup of coffe @ my fave cafe with my fave friend...heheheh.......what else??...nothin'....just cuddling up at my room with music on and mistery novel....what a cure.....

then i saw my baby nephew, hafizh last weekend...haven't seen him in 2 weeks ...my God...he's so lovely n soo adorable...so big n so cute...heheheh....finally since he's getting bigger now, i had the courage to hold him...heheheh....meeting my aunties, my mom's older sisters, 3 actually, who just came from Java....to visit my brother's newborn baby....you can guess what was really happening....though i have already oversaw it...i mean, what else?...what's new???...the same old question still came up....no matter what my answer was....i couldn't seem to get it right....left me speechless....well u know, i can't entirely blame them...since my mom passed away almost 2 years ago...they all feel that they are responsible to what happen in my life...to make sure that my life is allright...my life is okay......

truth is....i'm glad they still care about me...but they sometimes forget that i'm all grown up now...i can take care of myself...that i am a free spirited one...to do what i wish to do....to have my life they i want it....because i know...that's exactly what my mom would want from me...if she were still alive...she always knew that i could always take care of myself...so....i'll make damn sure...that i'll be just that....


in the loving memory of my beloved deceased mother...

wiken

today is just like another monday....hectic, bored, sleepy....bla bla bla...
i don't blame it entirely on monday for the boredom and sleepyness i am having...partly might be caused by my lack of restness on weekend.....but again...how could i just stay put in my room without going out at all????...no can do...

my first agenda last weekend was...visiting my baby nephew...geez i really missed him out last two weekend....and i just knew it...he's just getting bigger and bigger...boy...he's such a handsome babe!!!!....i went to my brother's house on friday night, and then...on saturday i got back to my dorm cause i had a date ...heheheh...we wanted to go to prj (geezz...:p)....but since it was really hot...we decided to go to pi....(wish came true, cause i wanted to see M sale, the bags actually heheheh)...cause he was going to find me something for my birthday...:)...(cool....i got what i wanted....hehehehhe)

no bags left...instead i met an ex-collegue whose wife is also working in the same company as i am. But i didn't see her...and then i also met dina and hikari, who were already getting in the line to cashier..:p....with pants and jeans in hands...hehehehhe....women....then....we went to sogo...got my gift....stopped by at olala for a mochalatte (yummy)....and a nice leisurely talk, 'bout everything, looking and giving comments to people around us....hehehhehe........then upstairs, sneaked a peek at 9west....mann...i love looking at the shoes...heheheh...but i still got my sanity and not spending my money down there, got something for his cute lil sister, and a t-shirt for him....and just looking around commenting on the crazy prices there for things that probably won't get a second glance except for the price only....

after that i went to my bro's house again...thinking that i would rather see hafizh then spending sat night at my room. On sunday, i headed to ps, we were going to have 'arisan'...hehehe....it was my turn actually, so i was very eager...saw Glenn Fredly singing...those mellow songs...it was so crowded, i thought that everyone was spending the day at ps. Hanging out at 3 different places, then headed back to stbd at 7pm....but i stopped by at angel's to get my gift (again...hehehhe)...and accompanied her to find new dorm..and thanks God, we got it, just right in front of her current dorm. It's new and very clean...cool...then continued talking in her old room, about everything, guys, mostly...heheheh.....then at about 9pm, went home, and felt light headed, couldn't wait to take a cool bath and had a sleep out...zzzzzzzz...zzzzz...zzzzz.....zzzzz

dinner

Yesterday....it seems so far away....

heheheh.......benernya sih, kmrn sore, gue sedikit berpikir, kenapa musti hujan deress bgt yahhh, cuaca sangat gag bersahabat,...bikin jakarta jadi banjir...buat pergi ke tempat yang deket dr kantor aja...waduh..butuh usaha ekstra keras...ditengah hujan deras pula....

bukannya gue ngeluh atau apa...tetep aja gue thankful banget, karena meski kmrn sore ujan, balmy, etc etc...tetep aja temen2 gue masih menyempatkan diri buat datang and had dinner bareng sama gue....dalam rangka apa yah...hmmm...:p...

and justru dengan kondisi kayak gitu, pulang kerja, ujan, bikin selera makan kita jadi "menggila"...tanpa basa basi...langsung aja sikat abis apa aja yg ada didepan mata....(the food is what i mean... hehehe..ntar disangka makan gelas n piring juga kan gawat)....
ada satu cerita menarik juga, tempat kita makan kmrn, kalo pas jam2 dinner emang antri bgt, waiting list...jadi gue udah reserved sehari sebelumnya...n karena temen2 gue datangnya gag barengan....alhasil kita disana ampe 2jam-an...nunggu ampe temen gue yg terakhir datang kelar makan...kayaknya 2jam itu adalah rekor disana...cos tambah lama kayaknya waiter2nya jadi jutek sama kita, pesenan kita yang terakhir2 ampe lama banget disaji-in....yang ampe pulang pun...mbak2 receptionis yang ada didepan udah gag mampu lagi tuk menyunggingkan senyum lagi pas bilang terima kasih sama kita pas kita cabut dr situ.....heheheheh....

intinya buat gue,...tempat itu enak2 makanannya...and also quiet cozy, gue udah beberapa kali kesitu dan memang gag selama yang kemaren....tapi tetep aja dengan kejadian kemaren, gue jadi mikir, kita kan customer, no matter how long we stay there, how much money we spend, or how many people waiting in the list....WE deserve to be treated nicely...
But, since it was my "dinner"...i wasn't going to let anything to ruin it....jadi kemaren kita tetep ketawa ketiwi...ampe kita ngelewatin tempat itu lagi untuk kedua kali and liat si mbak receptionis yang masih aja jutek, padahal gag mungkin lah dia gag inget sama kita, it was just a minute ago gitu loh...jadi...sc**w them...we still had fun last night... eniwei......didn't we girls!!!!.....

thanks frenzz....luvvvvv

rencana liburan rame2...

'cos life is so hectic and depressing sometimes...(gag tau deh, gue doang apa semuanya juga)....anak2 sinfull faces skrg lagi rencanain buat liburan bareng....gag jauh2 sih, pengennya ke Anyer or Carita...berasa masih sekolah aja, bawaannya kl tengah taun pengen libur...padahal jatah cuti udah minus kaleee...:p

buat gue, denger kata Carita aja...wakss..langsung semangat 45, udah gag sabarr pengen cepet2 sampe ke hari h, berangkat...trus main2 di pantainya...(udah kebayang2)...maklum deket kan dr jakarta....

trusss kmrn gue ketemu sama dian....yang dengan baik hati makan ayam deket kost-an gue, trus mampir ke kost, langsung deh cerita2 since she missed out the last gathering....:p....trusss -nya lagi...dian cerita drpd kita ke Anyer or Carita...kenapa gag sekali2 ke Pulau Umang,....deket Anyer juga sih, tapi kita musti nyebrang lagi...tp bentar cuman sekitar 5 menit katanya...alhasil dr tadi..gue browsing nyari website....udah dapet n...ternyataa kereennn bangettt yah bowww...(check the pic above...and happy drooling, cause i already have...heheheh).......maklum aja gue kan selalu menganggap diri gue anak gunung (cos kampung gue dkt gunung, meski gag pernah naik gunung juga sihhh)....kalau denger kata pantai...langsung deh....semangattt...

jadi, skrg gue lagi nunggu dengan cemas...cos bu EO-nya kayaknya lagi sibuk bgt, jadi belom response semua email2 kita....jadi dr tadi, cuman gue, dian, n sari aja yang sahut2an di email...(semoga yg lain gag marah...heheheh)...jadi...kapannn dunkkk!!!!!!!

pOOL GaMe

about time to go home but i'm still at my desk @ the office....

tonight,...the guys from work, and also people who had worked here before...are all going to bengkel @scbd, we are going to have a pool game....i know it sounds refreshing...but i dunno whether i'll come and joint them or not...

no matter what u do everyday...with tons of work, or u just do the usual work...in the end...u will feel beaten....why???....well that question has been lingering in my mind for quite sometime...and i'm still looking for the right answer...:p...

hhmm....@ 2nd thought, i don't feel like going out tonight...wanna go home...have some nice hot bath..and read this novel i just borrowed from my coworker in my cozy bed...:P...sounds more refreshingggg....:-)

...sinfull faces friends...

Sinfull faces friends and the founder...(hehehhehe)
...on my birthday at Cup&Cino last friday,...sophie took the pic, minus dian (she got to finish her paperwork for school) and vivie (who got exhausted after coming back from out of town), plus new member...dory, and sari's pal Stiz....

thanks yah guys...for remembering, for the candle, for the togetherness and...for reminding me that life is too good to waste...:-)...

miss you dian and vivie...hope you girls can be there again next time...

Luv 'ya all,

..just nothin'....

????have you ever????

pernah gag sih, ngalamin yang namanya...feeling so alone??...feels like you have noone at all...perasaan kayaknya gag ada orang yang care sama loe...padahal loe punya banyak temen, loe punya keluarga, yang memang udah jelas pasti sayang sama loe...

tapi tetep aja yah, that feeling will arrive unexpectedly....disaat yang paling ngga loe sangka-sangka, tau-tau aja....pas kerjaan lagi numpuk, ada deadline, lagi jarang telpon ke rumah, lagi jarang maen sama temen atau..pas lagi bete sama "yayang" loe.....kalo udah kayak gitu...rasanya kayak jadi orang yang paling miserable diseluruh dunia...pengennya tidur and berhari2 gag bangun...biar lupa kalo ada "feeling" itu....

kalo pas lagi "feeling the worst" gitu...biasanya ngapain yah...kl gue, obat yang paling manjur...is...inget2, apa gue belakangan lagi jauh dari Yang Diatas, sholat, banyakin doa....abis itu tidur lama2...heheheheh....trus gue bakal telpon2 ke rumah, ke temen2 gue,....just to make sure that they are still there...

to me, that's what life is all about sometimes...the need to be nestled, cared and loved by others...:) ...just to be around the people that you love....

..LovE iS...

..LovE iS...

They say it?s a river, that circles the earth
A beam of light shining to the edge of the universe
It conquers all, it changes everything
They say it?s a blessing, they say it?s a gift
They say it?s a miracle
And I believe that it is
It conquers all, but it?s a mystery
Love breaks your heart
Love takes no less than everything
Love makes it hard
And it fades away so easily
In this world we?ve created
In this place that we live
In the blink of an eye the darkness slips in
Love lights the world
Unites the lovers for eternity
Love breaks the chains
Love aches for everyone of us
Love takes the tears and the pain, and it turns it in-
To the beauty that remains
Look at this place
It was paradise, but now it?s dying
I?ll pray forlove
I?ll take my chances that it?s not too late
Love breaks your heart
Love takes no less than everything
Love makes it hard
And fades away so easily
Oh oh oh
Love breaks the chains
Love aches for everyone of us
Love takes the tears and the pain, and it turns it in-
To the beauty that remains

a YeaR oLDeR...

Last friday...finally i got a year older...
Got to blow the candles twice...:p...1st on friday at the office together with others who celebrate bdays on june...
and then...on saturday afternoon at Cup&Cino...with my dearest sinfull faces friends...:)...it was quite refreshing, lots of talking and laughing...

In between those two, i had my birthday dinner with someone special...:p...on the 24th eve...and it was raining pretty hard when he picked me up at the office, i remembered one of my friend said that according to Chinese beliefs, rain brings luck to the person who celebrate their birthday on a raining day....so i was just wishing to God...:)...that it would be so...aminn

Sumtimes, we forgot to realize that life goes on..and that we could only look back to learn things...and that's all we could do...but then again...bday to me...is a reminder that our life is a year less and there're still soo many things to do...to make our life meaningfull....